Haloranch

They're delivering the gifts and food this afternoon to our 4 Adopt-a-Families. Years ago Hans started this in his Engineering Department. At that time his department was given one family with several kids for whom everyone chipped in. It was so overwhelmingly successful that the next year they provided for two families. Now they do four. Since the beginning, Hans and I always provided the Christmas dinner: turkey and all the trimmings plus a copy of my turkey soup recipe and all the ingredients. Yesterday we put together the food boxes: Each box was wrapped in Christmas paper, the shiny foil roaster at one end with the soup recipe pasted into it with a cheery red bow. I tied each bag with long and colourful curly ribbons - the onions, turnip, celery, carrots, potatoes, etc. There's a bag of spices (including bay leaves, paprika) and barley for the soup, cans of chopped tomatoes and garlic to perk it up. The families don't know who all the donors are but they do ha

It's very early and I'm in the hot tub, watching the sun pink the sky behind the greenhouse. I see a large bird awkwardly trying to land on the edge of its roof, large wings flapping. Maybe it's the great horned owl, I think to myself. Suddenly, the wings cease their restless activity. They remain vertical and motionless. I peer intently through the window trying to discern detail and slowly, it comes into focus. It's a mule deer, staring back at me.

My Favourite Dotter offered to perform a service or do an unpleasant task for us for Christmas. A few years ago she painted our downstairs bathroom in pale grey and stencilled pretty little gold and silver squares that tumble down the walls, diminishing in size as they fall. I love it. And it's something I didn't want to do myself, so I'm especially grateful. This year she again offered her services but we don't have anything that needs painting. But I do have a large empty space above the bed in the main spare room that needs a picture. The room is very Zen-like and tranquil, with a pale celadon quilt and soft green walls and carpet. It needs just the picture to complete it. I saw one in New York in July, but it was only about 15" long and I need something 6'6". And Favourite Dotter is going to do one for us for Christmas! She is an extremely gifted artist. Twelve years ago she did a rose and rosebud in pointilism using only black ink. It was a g

I haven't blogged for awhile but then, this blog was intended as a vehicle to talk about our trips. We just returned this morning from an overnight stay in Edmonton. It's not very far away, but it qualifies as a trip, doesn't it? Mon Dieu! I am grasping at straws here. Who cares if it qualifies or not? It's my blog and I can blog if I want to. *sing it*! So off we went yesterday morning, dropped off our leaky spa motor and checked into the Coast Edmonton Plaza downtown. Hans had business in the afternoon and then at 5:00 we were invited for drinks with the rest of the group. I expected this to take place in the hotel, after which we would walk one block to Characters for dinner. Instead, a limo bus was waiting for us at the curb and we piled in. It was a party bus, with colourful blinking disco lights lazering across our shoulders and onto a screen at the back. Oddly, there was country music playing which seriously clashed with the frenzied light show. We

I have free time and nothing to do. The devil, wielding my hands, has forged this: Nothing. Not a damn thing. Some things even the devil won't touch.

What a glorious day outside. The sky is endlessly blue and a few remaining golden leaves shimmerin the breeze and catch the early morning sun. (Well, mid morning. I don't get up that early on Saturdays!) I stop and watch as seven stately Canada geese float slowly down the creek. They belong on the water, where their ungainly land-clumsiness is hidden. Today, under the clear sky, the creek itself is a crystalline blue. It's much easier to see it now that the leaves have fallen. Its bright colour is enhanced by the tall golden-bronze grasses flaking its banks. It couldn't be more picturesque. The fall gardening cleanup is waiting for me, but it will have to wait a bit longer. I have coffee to drink and a treadmill to walk.

A 31 pound box of salmon was delivered to my office this afternoon. Hans caught some huge salmon in early September on a B.C. fishing trip and we knew that eventually, after it was processed and frozen, it would be delivered to our door. Unfortunately, our door's hard to find standing as it does on an acreage. Our mailing address is the same as friends who live 15 km away. Not wanting to take the chance of having our salmon delivered to our faraway friends, or anonymous people in between, we chose instead to have it delivered to my office where I was the envy of everyone who spied the box. This evening, I unpacked it. There is barbeque style hot smoked, which gives the salmon a moist but cooked texture. Then there's lox style cold smoked. This is my favourite. It's very moist and almost sushi in style. Ideally it should be sliced very thinly but I can handle eating a thicker chunk of it. This is soooo good with cream cheese and capers. There's also candied salmon.

Tomorrow I lead my first Rotary meeting. When I think of it, my stomach floats up and I feel like I'm dropping down an elevator shaft. I don't like it. And yet, I can't stop my mind from drifting to tomorrow's meeting, over and over and over. Each time, that queasy floaty feeling of stomach seeking exit through mouth returns. God, I wish it were tomorrow night.

We had company for dinne last night. The gentleman who hosted us when we were in Albany is here with his wife. They spent the weekend in the mountains and actually did the drive from Banff to Jasper to our house in one day! That's a lot of driving but we anaesthetized them with wine when they arrived and made it all okay. We had a large dinner. I should have made less, but it's always a struggle for me to cut back because I want to be hospitable and I equate hospitality with generous food and drink. We had blue cheese stuffed apricots as nibblies with our wine (thanks Vanessa!) Vanessa is the Recipe Queen. She loves to pore through new recipes and try out any that look appealing. When she hits a winner, she tells me and doesn't let up until I promise to try it. The cheese crowned tenderloins we had as the main course are also thanks to her keen eye for the delicious different. Dinner: shrimp with aioli sauce laid out like flowers curled around a dollop of sauce, stem

Hans has been doing brilliantly in golf. At this rate he'll able to keep us in luxury items after he retires!! The day before he didn't win any prizes, but he did card 78, the lowest he's been since New Zealand. Yesterday he and his team won the tournament and so got first crack at the prizes. He chose a Stormtech rain outfit in a matte pewter colour but when he got home, discovered it wasn't a jacket and pants at all, but 2 jackets. Evidently they weren't sets so it's not like someone else is walking around with two pants. So I'm getting a jacket and we can match when we go for walks. After it fits.

http://articles.health.msn.com/id/100110384/ Say good-bye to the old stereotype of weight lifters being stupid. According to this article, iron-pumpers and exercisers may not only be building their bodies, but their brains as well! Of course, this information was no shock to me. During yesterday’s 3 treadmilling episodes I reflected on Newton, definitely a strange man, and why he kept the news of his calculus invention a secret for 27 years. Seems being in shape and engaging in regular exercise continues to have unseen and far-reaching benefits. What a blow to academia.

Hans and I joined a group for dinner at the Rusty Pelican. My eyes zeroed in on the seafood platter: lobster tail, shrimp, scallops and a piece of fried snapper which came with fattening carbs or Caesar salad. Yes, I chose the Caesar! Can you see my halo? Better yet, can you see me shrinking? Maybe it's still too soon but keep watching. We had a bottle of deliciouws Kendall-Jackson Sauvignon Blanc from California. It was cold and crisp, just the way I like it. And as good luck would have it, the other 4 in our group drank red wine so Hans and I had the whole bottle to ourselves. Mwa ha ha. I tried in vain to be circumspect but couldn't make my lips form the word "no" when he kept topping up my glass. Oh, and the Hurricane Shrimp? None of us ordered it but we all mentioned it in honour of our absent guest, Dick, who was driving north out of Houston towards Ft. Worth even as we were enjoying the meal he was planning on hosting.

It's a gorgeous, sunny blue day outside, and there's an Alzheimer's Break in the park outside my office. I guess they forgot they had already had one on Monday in my building. They are serving free coffee and cake. Most days the thought of free cake would get my adrenaline surging and I confess that even now, I feel the tug of temptation. But, I've been labouring so hard (and often!) on the treadmill that I'm actually going to resist the cake. The free coffee is appealing though. But even there, I'm afraid it's appealing only because I'll be closer to the cake...

I can't seem to get the mountains out of my mind. So many times I've seen them, but each time is like the first time. The sky was so very blue, and the snow was so dazzlingly white. I caught my breath each time I looked up. You couldn't paint that picture; it would look fake. With a thick blanket of trees across their feet, they looked like a row of ancient women warming their toes under quilts. We took photos but I'm not posting them because they don't do the mountains justice (and also because I don't remember how!)

I savour the delicious perfume of the sweet peas as I step onto the deck. "What?" you say. "Blogging again? Shouldn't you be on the treadmill?" "Yes," I reply smugly. "I did my penance and stepped out to pick the last of the Romaine." In the garden the frost has left unmistakable evidence of its visit. The squash leaves are shrivelled and black, leaving their pale mystery squash in stark relief. We don't know what squash hybrid we were sold, but it bears no resemblance to the zucchini we wanted. Call me if you want some.

I've been blogging all morning under the guise of doing something useful. I like to enjoy my coffee and a good book on mornings when I'm at home but today, in penance for the food and wine this weekend, I decided I could only read my book if I was on the treadmill. Hence all the blogging. But now, I'm at the end of my stories. The book is here beside me, I've been dressed all morning in my treadmill gear, and the water bottle awaits. So does the dreaded treadmill.

Trivial Pursuit isn't my favourite game because, obviously, I don't usually win. If I did, it would quickly become my favourite. For this very reason it's a favourite with the rest of my family. Hans almost always wins and Alethea loves the game so she can challenge herself against him. It's a double thrill when she wins. I wonder how they felt this weekend when I won?? I felt great! Actually, I can't claim a clear victory. I was leading when we (not me) decided to forego the insetion of pie pieces and just read questions. I think the several bottles of wine we drank blunted our competitive urges and the game morphed into a congenial queestion and answer ame. But for a brief moment, I was the winner at Trivial Pursuit. Remember, you read it here first. Earlier, Alethea and I played Scrabble which is my favourite game (see reasons above). If I can't win, there's no one I'd rather get beaten by than my daughter. She didn't win this weekend, bu

Dietje Hagedoorn is a jewelry designer in Canmore and time permitting, I thought we might visit her shop and so downloaded her address off the Internet. She was quite hard to find. We drove back and forth down the street where she had her shop and it wasn't there. Turns out the address I had was an old one. The phone book yielded her new address and so we tried again. Still not an easy shop to find but eventually, there it was. It certainly didn't look like much of a shop but the sign on her door said she was open. The furious barking of a large dog came flying through the door as Alethea opened it. I stayed in the car! An odd way to sell your jewellery, I thought. An attractive, petite woman followed the puppy down the stairs. "How did you find me?" she asked with a big smile. Hmm. Most people don't make their shops this hard to find, nor ask you how you finally got there. "Well it wasn't easy," I said. "Some months ago a woman came in

We did it, but we did it backwards. Sunday morning we decided to take our little forest path in the other direction and see where it took us. A few people passed us, but that's normal enough. It was, after all, another gorgeous fall day and perfect for a walk in the woods. I'm grateful our walk was considerably shorter than Bill Bryson's walk in the woods . The minute you step onto the forest path, you're in another world. It's so quiet. All you hear are the leaves shivering in the breeze an the pebbles shifting under your feet. All your senses perk up. In the cool shadows of the trees the air is so crisp you think it will shatter if you flick your fingers. But when you step into exposed sunlight, it changes. Waves of fragrant warm earth spiced with the sweet smell of decaying leaves prick at your nose. We saunter along in no particular hurry, and see more and more people heading our way. They are all wearing blue ribbons with "25" on them, the 25

We took a drive up to Silvertip so Hans could show us the golf course where he had played. Oddly, they wouldn't let us walk the course if no one was playing. Since we weren't allowed to enjoy their beautiful vistas, we drove through the upscale residential area to look at houses instead and we found an Open House. Undaunted by their late model Jaguar sedan parked in the driveway, we walked in. Million dollar open houses are unlike your regular open houses. You get escorted even though the house was vacant other than the large open concept kitchen/ living/ dining room. It was, of course, outrageously gorgeous. The foyer has an elevator which goes right to the master bedroom. I presume this is for your convenience so when you've finished primping in the bathroom with its 5-headed shower or soaked in the oval jetted tub, you can just whisk yourself away to your luxury automobile without having to walk the unnecessary steps through your living room and down the stairs. I

Ahh,Canmore. Banff's little sister has grown into a beautiful young woman. Barely 3 steps from the deck of our rented house put us onto a little forest path. We took it one morning and followed it along a shallow crystalline creek reflecting the brilliant fall colours in its smooth face. Not a ripple disturbed the water. We came to the first of many benches (how very civilized) and found we could count the rocks in the water. On another day we might have lingered and done that but this morning, the air was crisp and more conducive to walking than idling. The path led us into town where we blended in with other tourists wearing cameras and fuzzy vests. The locals were in shorts and T-shirts. We found another path, this one a raised boardwalk curving first through marshes and then along another creek dotted with ducks. Purple mountains surrounded us, their fresh snowy peaks glittering in the sun. High above a plane bisected the blue with its arrow straight contrail. Through a

If you read my previous post, you'll know that I get a little anxious when Hans is away overnight. I'm much better now that we have an electronic gate across our driveway. However, before the gate and before I had a cell phone, I had the following routine: - outside shoes by the bed (so I could step out the window) - car keys on night stand (so I could sneak to the garage and get my car) - portable phone on night stand (so I could call for help from my car or as I ran across the fields) When I confessed my fears and routine to Teddy one day, she said with a straight face, "Why don't you just park your car outside the bedroom window? Better yet, why don't you just sleep in your car?"

I have the slightest touch of paranoia. It only rears its ugly head when Hans is away. In fact, I am completely and blissfully unaware of it all other times. But when he's not in bed beside me, well, I hear things. Recently he was away fishing and my worst fear came true. I am in bed, the house is dark, and I hear something go bump-in-the-night. From the closet. Where the Boogeyman lives. An icy fist clutches at my heart and my Paranoid Brain goes on red alert. My Logical Brain knows no one is lying in wait until the moment I turn off the lights. But evidently my logical brain is connected to the light switch. Eyes open wide, I pull all available moonlight into them but I see nothing. The only sound I hear now is the joggity rhythm of my heart. The closet door remains firmly shut. I know I have to get up. The alternative is to lie there and continue staring at the closet door. I also know I am being silly but in the dark, I can't acknowledge logic. So, I open the do

"It was this big," Hans said, spreading his hands well in excess of 2 1/2 feet. "Terrific!" I replied in disbelief. But he had pictures to prove it. Not only were the salmon well in excess of 24", they were also quite hefty. The biggest one Hans landed was 17 pounds. Of course, the really big one got away.

I am riveted to the t.v. these days as I watch the tragedy unfold in New Orleans. And what's going to happen to the million people who were lucky enough to leave New Orleans before Katrina struck, but who now have nowhere to go? Now what? Are they allowed to join the throngs of refugees filling up the Astro Dome and other centres? Some politicians have been slammed for suggesting New Orleans should be bulldozed. Certainly not rebuilt. Those opinions make sense to me.

I fell on a crack and twisted my ankle. We're moving our office into temporary quarters on the same floor. When our old office was originally created, the floor was extended by adding 10' of some substance which was different from the existing floor. It didn't take long for the two substances to conflict. Thereafter, there was a pronounced ridge where the two floors met and over time, this ridge increased to a full vertical inch in height differential. It was never a big problem since the ridge was very close to the edge of our desks. While occasionally it might cause you to stumble, with the desks were right there it was easy to catch yourself. This morning both desks were moved to their temporary homes. The ridge is now fully exposed. While carrying an armload of binders (blinders, more likely) I twisted my left foot on the ridge and down I went. We have everything in our first aid kits except tensor bandages so I'll be hobbling around a bit.

33 years ago today Hans and I got married. I've been asked, "What makes a relationship last so long?" Most of it comes down to who you are. What your values are, your ethics, your morals. A lot of it is luck. We're lucky that as we grew older and changed, we changed together. A lot of it is money. More marriages break up over money than over anything else. We are fortunate not to have that problem, though money was certainly tight in the early years. And finally, we treat each other with affection and respect. But most of all, we have fun together!

The Maple Leaf Grill is THE place to eat in Banff. I know this to be true because two of my dinner companions have lived in Banff for over 30 years and own Canada House , an art gallery now run by their daugher Barb and her husband Eric. I met Peter and Marika through our friends from Wellington, New Zealand. Wally and Margot are currently on a 4 month holiday which includes a visit to Banff. Despite their lengthy absence from NZ, they are on a tight schedule in Alberta and didn't have time to visit Red Deer. So they invited Hans and me to join them for dinner in Banff. Peter and Marika spend most of their time at their other residence in B.C. and so asked their daughter to recommend a good place to eat. That's how I found myself enjoying *happy hour* at Peter's condo prior to dinner. "Can I get you some kind of cool aid?" he asked when I arrived. I heard *Kool Aid* and was momentarily nonplussed. After all, some people don't drink. I even know a few

The mole left a hole. But, thanks to my skillful surgeon Dr. Skochylas, it doesn't show. In fact, this morning I've had to point out my wound to everyone and they all said the same thing: "If you hadn't told me, I wouldn't have noticed." Well, that's why I told you! I had a mole in my right eyebrow. I first noticed it as a teen when I started plucking my brows though undoubtedly it was there before that. It was never a problem and when I was younger, it was smaller. Sort of like the rest of me. Since the mole got bigger my eyebrow hairs no longer grew in a pretty line but stuck out from it in a perculiar starburst fashion much like the witch's wart in Snow White. The good doc saw it one day and said, "I can remove that." Alright! It had never occurred to me to have this done, and so we set it up. Yesterday noon was the big day. I'm lying stretched out on the operating table in Outpatients. "Are you just going to give me a l

It was the best of times. We had a huge party to ease Hans' transition into the next decade. 50 people came to wish him well on Saturday, and we pigged out on pig. Mr. Big Pig came and turned the beastie on a spit for 5 hours while succulent aromas wafted around the yard. The cats hovered nearby hoping for a stray morsel. The humans weren't far behind. Festive balloons lined the driveway and encircled the deck. Three huge Rubbermaid containers filled with beer, coolers and pop covered in ice lay in the shade of the front deck while boxes of wine (yes, we only serve the best!) lined the downstairs bar. Little deck tables were covered with finger foods: an ice bowl with fresh flowers frozen between its walls was chilling pink shrimp; a tasty crab dip sat in another corner; a creamy feta slice smothered in honey and garnished with cracked pepper left its sticky residue on many fingers. The really good part about having lots of people over is that they take care of themselve

I'm an idiot, and I have proof. Back in June a little *check* light went on in my car. Not the oil light or anything straightforward like that. I had to look it up and the manual said, "Take it to your dealer." Okay. After work I pick the car up at the dealer's. "I've run the diagnostic, but the only thing we can find is that the gas cap is on loose," said the serviceman. "That'll be $50 please." "What? $50 to tell me the gas cap is on loose? That can't be the problem." "The code says it's an evaporation leak, and it's all we could find." He goes on to explain the 3-click rule. "Tighten the gas cap until you hear 3 clicks. Then you know it's sealed." "But how do I tell my husband it cost $50 to find out the gas cap was loose?" He humours me and gives me a long and convoluted explanation which I can't remember anyway, so I 'fess up. It's no big deal. A week later th

Hmm. Hans' surprise birthday party is no longer a surprise. In the last week a couple of people have inadvertently spilled the beans. But, it's SO much easier now that he knows!! You know, I'm guessing he would have become suspicious anyway when he saw the boxes of wine and all the beer and pop stacked up in the wine cellar.

We laughed till we hurt. Then we laughed some more. John Lithgow plays the Michael Caine role and Norbert Leo Butz plays the Steve Martin role. Man, is he funny! I'm so glad we went to see a comedy and not one of the other musicals. Laughing out loud. What a perfect way to end a day.

There is just a large hole in the ground surrounded on all sides by a heavy duty chain link fence. Then we read the posters on the fence giving the timelines of 9-11. It brings back all the memories of that horrible morning nearly four years ago. It is an emotionally charged place haunted by grief. Then, the melancholy notes of "Amazing Grace" float towards us on the wind, played on a solitary flute. How very perfect.

Ellis Island is a poignant place. The great hall has been renovated to look very much like it did 100 years ago when 5000 immigrants per day flooded in carrying with them their meagre but precious possessions. On our self guided audio tour we heard interviews from seniors who still remember when their parents bundled them up to travel halfway around the world seeking a better life. Often the children came with with their female relatives, the men having left years earlier to earn enough to send for them. One elderly woman wept as she recounted the reunion with her dad when she was only four. Her memory of that day is still vivid and she is very emotional when she tells how her Father sobbed as he knelt to embrace her. One young girl of 11 travels alone from Hiroshima, Japan, to meet up with her parents. There are sad stories, but luckily not too many, of people who were turned away because they had communicable diseases. When it was a child that was diagnosed with the illness, fam

Our Hotel QT is quite a funky place. Evidently if we are under 25 we would receive a 25% discount. We are definitely uncool people in a very cool place and we're lucky we don't have to pay a premium, being so far over the age of 25! But what the heck, it has a pool!! That is my focus during our first day walking around Times Square. Waves of superheated air boil up from the sidewalks. So hot, they take your breath away. Sometimes a heat wave is spiced with the pungent odour of sewer gas. Now that really takes your breath away. The traffic is a ribbon of yellow as the cabs ply their trade on both sides of the street. There are no busses except for the "hop on, hop off" red double deckers which give tours of Manhattan. These are the best way to see the city especially as the temperature soars into the high 90's and humidity is thick at 87%. Walking is not an option. The tour guides hustle shamelessly for tips and to prevent you sneaking off the bus witho

I forgot to mention that our trip to Albany wasn't the usual quick and dirty fly-in/ fly-out. We made it okay to Chicago. Then boarded the plane, taxied out to the runway, and the captain said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain speaking. We've just been informed that due to a line of thunderstorms in Michigan we've been asked to wait indefinitely here on the sweltering tarmac while you sit in un-airconditioned discomfort. Thank you for flying United". Jerks. It's possible that I'm not remembering what he said word for word. We sat there for two hours. Two hours! Did you know that they turn off their engines while they sit there? It's 100 @&#^$% degrees out there, and that's not factoring in the shimmering heat waves lofting up from the black runway. You know what your car's like when you step into it on a hot day. That's what this was like, only 150 times worse. That's because there were 150 bodies in the car with

Here we are a little outside of Albany at the GE Betz complex. The lodge, which is on the GE company site, is gorgeous. It's a recently built (2 year old) company owned lodge to house guests and visting GE staff. There's a fitness club, but it's a separate building and the tall trees between the lodge's deck and the club hid it from mhy view. The complex is huge, with 1850 employees. The lodge is like a hotel, but alas, without a pool. I spent yesterday alternately in the beautiful air conditioned lounge and on the deck, which overlooks the brilliant blue Mohawk River below. When the heat got too much, I'd go back inside and sip a cool drink. Every morning there's a continental breakfast with beautifully sliced, peeled and presented cold fruit, bagels, muffins, coffee, juice, etc. There's also a 24 hour pantry where you can get snacks, make specialty coffees (I tried cashew caramel) and help yourself to what's in the fridge. There's an open

Shh. It's 10:15 p.m. and everyone except Suzanne is meeting in the lounge dressed for a midnight paddle. Suzanne got a touch of heat stroke today and isn't feeling well, lying in bed drinking lots of fluids. Teddy is tired and her blistered thumb hurts. She doesn't want to go, but Lana insists, saying she'll chauffeur her and Teddy won't even have to paddle. There's a plankton bloom in the ocean. Conditions are just right to see the very special effects this creates at night. Off we go. It's not easy carrying our kayaks down to the water's edge holding the boat in one hand and aiming a flashlight at our toes with the other. We whisper and giggle, and because we know we have to keep quiet so as not to awaken the staff, we try to giggle softly. But the rocks shuffle and tumble around our feet making too much noise. We giggle harder. Amazingly, we're launched in record time. The water appears thick and oily smooth. We're still whispering bec

Thursday was another perfect day. An incoming low pressure system calmed the sprawling ocean and we skimmed along as on a mirror. It was so beautiful. We were promised an easy paddle with lots of marine life, and that's exactly what we got. The early morning got quite hot and both Judy and Teddy needed to take off their jackets. Teddy's pedals also needed adjusting. Cal paddled over to Teddy first and lifted her skirt, reaching into the front of the cockpit to fix the pedals. Then he steadied her kayak and helped her undo the PFD, pull out her jacket and finally put everything back the way it was. Then he helped Judy do the same. It was low tide and Cal took us to a section between some islands where we saw the most splendid display of sea life. There were constellations of brilliantly coloured sea stars shimmering in hues ranging from deep rich purple to pale violet, from brilliant blue to the prolific orange stars. Interspersed we'd see clusters of black batstars w

Early Wednesday morning, 6:30 a.m. to be exact, Lana led us in a half hour "Greet the Sun" stretching exercise. We started with hands meeting prayer fashion, slowly stretching above out heads and opening our arms in a delicious reach-for-the-sky motion. She followed this stretch with a variety of movements that worked and pulled everything from arms and shoulders to legs and buttocks. We all felt so good afterwards that we unanimously agreed to do it again on subsequent days.

We had lunch one day by an ancient shell midden . Later we paddled to what appeared to be a random collection of rocks. However, it was really a cleverly constructed fish trap dating back to ancient times. These fish traps took advantage of high tides. The natives would beat the water and herd the fish into the inlet and over the manually constructed rock walls. When the tide receded, the fish remained trapped.

On Tuesday Lana cleaned Cal's clock in Bocce, so he was keen to redeem himself. Those Bocce balls are heavy! We played on the front lawn of the lodge accompanied by the incessant chatter of the hummingbirds who darted back and forth from the feeder. It was impossible to count them, so quickly did they flit around, but there were easily a dozen. We were told they were still juveniles as adults fight for territory and don't willingly share their feeder. The Bocce tournament was fun but we stopped after four games, each team having won two. Even liberally spritzed with a variety of insect repellents we got bitten by the mozzies who were out in record numbers and boy, were they hungry.

While I was enjoying my wild ride on the waves, Sue had the misfortune of single kayaking today and was locked in her own private purgatory. Battling the headwinds is energy sapping. Battling the lumpy water makes it even harder. Lana stayed close to her, and so did Cal (with me in front). They took turns telling her silly jokes and at one point Cal asked if she want him to tie on, but the said she was okay, just getting tired. It was a very hard paddle.

Earlier this morning, our longest day, Lynda and I had decided to partner in the yellow double. But as everyone was sorting and loading gear, discussion turned to who was going to double and who was going to single. Cal said he'd be my partner today. "Sorry Lynda", I said, sincerely grateful for his offer. "I'd rather have Cal". As we paddled from Clarke to Benson, Teddy, who was with Lynda, glances over. "He's not paddling" she said. And he wasn't. Cal said that the rule when paddling with him is that I can take a paddling break whenever I want (and apparently so could he) but I wanted to show him that I would be a good partner and do my part so I paddled harder. How stupid is that?? I'm sure he's laughing if he reads this, but I really thought I paddled harder on that day than on any of the others. That evening my wrists were swollen and I had to loosen my wristwatch two notches, but I still had the best day! It was fairl

After lunch on the beach at Benson Island Cal picked up a Horse Clam. "It's quite rude looking", he said, stating the obvious. Apparently the Horse Clam is kin to the Geoduck (pronounced gooeeduck) Clam which, incredibly, has an even bigger appendage. You can form your own visual image (or you can click on Geoduck above and see an actual picture). I can only assume that whoever named them got them mixed up. Following this amazing discovery, nine of us went for a walk in the woods while the married couple stayed behind for a nap.

This was one of the highlights of our kayak trip. It was also our longest paddle day at 13 nautical miles (15 land miles or 24 kilometres ). Cal had arranged for Hank to take our group of 11 to the outer western islands. We loaded the kayaks right after breakfast so we could be on the boat by 8:15, but first, we spotted a mama bear and her tiny little cub just outside the lodge window. Hank scared her off with a few impressively loud rifle shots so she wouldn't pose any danger to the guests. The way out seemed quite long even in the high-powered boat. At our dropoff point on Clarke Island Cal and Lana led us on a hike to an ancient gnarled cedar estimated to be 1500 years old. Its diameter must have been a good 20' but I'm terrible at estimates so if anyone has a better guess I'd welcome it. We couldn't see its top but glancing upwards, we saw a number of its "witch's brooms", a starburst of branches that is part of the tree's defense mechani

I met John as I was heading outside in full gear, ready to kayak. "Ready to roll?" he said. "Never say roll to a kayaker!" I replied. But his comment was foreshadowing. On one of our breaks Judy arrived at the beach and, having gotten in and out of her kayak numerous times without mishap, stepped out. And in she went. The wobbly kayak tipped her out. It was a warm day so the quick dip didn't cause her any discomfort. That was a good thing because she did it again later the same day! She named her kayak "Bronco".

I bet you thought this would be about us, but it's not! On our very first paddle we saw a black bear grazing in the shallows. We stilled our kayaks and watched quietly but it seemed quite unconcerned with us. We also saw two bald eagles perched high in the trees and jumping porpoises in the distance. Took a little walk after dinner to look at a lake close to the lodge. "It's only about 50 metres" said Cal. It was too early in our trip for us to know that Cal's estimation of distance and time are at odds with reality. I was keen to see the lake and asked if we could go there before taking another walk along a logging road. We plunged into the forest. There is no real trail. That should have been our first clue. Obviously this isn't a lake where the staff go swimming. We soldier on, once again picking our way around the icky slugs. "Anyone know anything about slugs?" asks Cal. "No." "About how they do it?" "No." &qu

We pooled some of our clothes and decided to do a quick laundry that evening after dinner. It's about 9:00 and we were all finally hungry enough to break into some of the appetizers we'd brought along so Lynda opened the package of smoked salmon we'd been carrying around for 3 days. Gail and I sat in the lounge and played a game of Scrabble. Teddy watched. Lynda prepared crackers for each of us with some cream cheese, salmon and capers and was serving us. My glass of wine was empty so I asked, "Teddy, would you get me some more wine?" "I've done the laundry. I've been working hard." "Fine." Not long after, Gail's beer is empty. "Gail, can I get you another beer?" asked Teddy. *sigh*

It's our second day and Teddy is doubling with me in the yellow kayak. *gasp*! I hear a sharply indrawn breath from Teddy. "What's wrong!" I call out. "Nothing" she says in a little voice, but I know she's lying. More indrawn breaths come from behind me. "What!" I call again, feeling slightly alarmed. I feel the kayak shift, and she's doing something funny with her paddle. Like not stroking in the water but waving it in the air and banging it on the kayak. "Eeeuw!" "Come on, what is it?" "There's a slug on your vest! It's crawling up your back!!" Now she has my attention. "Cal", she calls out, "can you come over here? Hurry!" I am so afraid to move. I sit rigidly and suppress the rising bile. Cal is there in an instant and Teddy waves her paddle at the slug. She had been trying to reach my back to poke it off but couldn't manage it. Deftly, he swings his kayak over and p

This wasn't our longest day, but it was certainly a busy one. Today Teddy and I switched positions. The steering with the rudder takes a little practice since the double kayaks, ours especially, are slow to respond to the rudder. So your instinct is to push down hard. By the time the kayak responds, it's usually time to hit the other pedal. And so we did. There were many unkind comments. "Don't follow the Yellow Peril" was heard. Others laughed at our zig-zag stich across the waters, saying we didn't have to tack since we had no sails. They were just mean. So we covered a little extra distance. Big deal. We got home first! Okay, so we missed the waterfall. But once we drew a bead on the lodge there was no stopping us and we homed right in. Brenda, bless her, accompanied us to the lodge but still, Teddy and I were a little afraid we'd get into trouble. Cal was very gracious about it but felt it his duty to remind us not to do it again, especiall

We were met on the dock by a barefoot Kerry, who we would later learn is a woman of amazing energy. She likes to dress in white jeans and t-shirt that, unbelievably, remain pristine in the wilderness, despite all the work she does. The Lodge is situated somewhere near the mouth of the channel and is run by Kerry and her husband Hank, whose primary duty (indeed only duty that we witnessed) is to drive the boat that we would be using later in the week. We were only one group of several that Kerry had as guests, and she laid out the house rules for the Lodge: . dining room is available all night for tea and coffee, fruit, bread, etc. . party there if you want as it won't disturb other guests. . two lounges - one with a piano, and one with a fridge. Use both. . games like Scrabble, cards, etc. are available for your pleasure. . stay on the floor which has your room. . rooms have no locks on doors and each room has a sink. . we share toilets and showers, which are down this hallway. I

We had dinner at a Greek Restaurant since the Clam Bucket was full and we would have had to wait an hour. We didn't have the time since we needed to meet with Cal at 8:00 p.m. for our first briefing. The Greek Restaurant was empty except for one table with 4 men (who were probably relatives). So we ordered the food and impressed our urgency upon the waitress, stating we had to be somewhere in an hour. "No problem", she assured us and went to place the order. Thirty minutes later, she finally came with our food. She explained. "In his haste, the chef cut his finger and so I have been helping him", and shrugged her shoulders in explanation. In the previous 30 minutes she had allowed a couple of girls to take a table but now, she was telling all customers that the chef was injured and that while they were welcome to come in, dinner was likely to be very, very late... Most took the hint and left, promising to come back another time.

"Look for someone with a bloodied finger", Teddy said as we deplaned. "What"? "We're late. She's been waiting and will have been twirling her keys around her finger for the last hour and a half". Shirley was, indeed, standing there with her keys in hand but no bloody finger. Instead, she was all smiles as she helped us load our luggage and obligingly stopped at the liquor store on the way to her B & B so we could pick up a bottle of wine for the evening. We had an amazing version of Eggs Benedict the next morning. The ham was thinly sliced and fitted into a muffin tin, filled with scrambled eggs, topped with a touch of Hollandaise and baked to bubbly perfection. The table centerpiece featured a fresh pineapple sliced lengthwise and both halves artfully filled with succulent melons topped with juicy red strawberries. A fragrant rose completed the fruit sculpture and my mouth watered just looking at it. Then came the blueberry and cream che

So I ask you, what kind of holiday starts with a quick stop to the pharmacy on the way to the airport for Advil? That's how it started for Teddy. She didn't know I already had enough Ibuprofen in my bag to keep us all pain free for the upcoming kayaking week. We met in the Calgary airport to catch our connecting flight to Comox. I had already had an accident. Getting out of the shuttle bus I accidentally ran my heavy suitcase over my big toe. Blood quickly filled my sandal and I left a trail on the airport floor leading to the bathroom, but it didn't really hurt. It was just messy. But we laughed together as we talked about our fears for the upcoming week and a frisson of relief shot through me to hear I wasn't the only one worried. Turns out Teddy's neck and back were sore, and I confessed I had had stress headaches. Turns out our worries were completely unfounded. We had an absolutly great time!! But we did use the Ibuprofen.

Teddy asked the following: "I read your blog account of your second session out and it points out my total ignorance! I didn't know they had pedals in kayaks! And why do you move the rudder up and down rather than side to side?" There's a rudder at the pointy end of the stern. It's usually flat against the kayak. When you are motoring along (LOL) you can put this rudder down and it helps you to steer left and right (so it does go side to side). You pull it up when you approach the rocky landings of the broken islands... and you pull it up PDQ so it doesn't scrape on the rocks and break off. I don't see why we need it as I'm hoping to be paddling in a straight line to the next island. Should this not be the case, well then, I'm probably screwed but I am able to turn the kayak with the paddles, sort of like in a canoe. A tippy canoe. "I guess I didn't realize we'd be wearing PFD's either...hadn't really thought about it! Bu

We did it again. This time we laughed and laughed without peeing our pants since we're experienced kayakers now. And to prove it, we showed each other our spectacular black and blue thighs. They are like matching honour badges and quite sizeable ones at that. Easily the size of my spread hand. I proudly showed them off at work, puckering cellulite be damned! Getting in and out was no easier this time. In fact, we had other things to contend with. Lynda outfitted us each with a PFD (Personal Flotation Device)and kayak skirt. The two PFDs were different and I grabbed one at random. The wrong one. It belongs to her flat-chested husband and I felt the difference immediately. He's a muscular fellow but apparently my chest is bigger. Odd. When I first tried on the vest the panels wouldn't even bend around the front but stuck out straight under my armpits. I unbuckled the bottom straps which allowed the zipper to meet in the front under my breasts. Not a hope in hel

This past weekend 4 of us were discussing the logistics of our upcoming kayak trip. Specifically, how on earth will we get enough wine from Red Deer to the lodge where we start our trip? There are six of us you know, and we are gone for a week. It merited serious discussion. Teddy and I decided we’d pick some up in Comox on Saturday since Sunday, anywhere in B.C. and definitely in small towns, all liquor stores will be closed. And we don’t really want to board the airplane with multiple boxes of wine slung under our arms. Then yesterday on our way to the lake to test the kayaks, we re-visited this important issue. Lynda mentioned that she would be driving her truck to B.C. at the end of June. Perfect! I’m the designated purchaser and will deliver the beverages to her, she’ll get them there, and apparently our belongings will be craned off the ferry so weight isn’t an issue and it looks like we’re in good shape at the other end too. Everything’s falling neatly into place.

I had my first kayaking experience yesterday evening and before I go any further, let me just say this: we laughed until we peed our pants. Some of it’s my fault. You have to straddle the kayak and make sure you’re properly lined up so that when you do the “outhouse squat” (sit down and stand up without using your hands) your bottom ends up in the teensy kayak hole where it should. This reminded me of the toilets in South Korea – the straddle part. In Korea your butt doesn’t actually touch anything. At least it shouldn’t. I had trouble there too. So I’m poised over the kayak, breasts and arms-holding-oars counterbalancing butt, and try to gracefully sink into the kayak. Hah. At a certain point I ran out of leg and so, with a plop, my butt dropped into the kayak and simultaneously my feet left the lakebed floor. “Don’t move! Leave your legs out and dangling! Get your balance!” Lynda said. The kayak rocked violently beneath me. When it stabilized a bit, I was told to inser

If there is no self, whose arthritis is this? Be here now. Be someplace else later. Is that so complicated? Drink tea and nourish life. With the first sip... joy. With the second... satisfaction. With the third, peace. With the fourth, a danish. Wherever you go, there you are. Your luggage is another story. Accept misfortune as a blessing. Do not wish for perfect health or a life without problems. What would you talk about? The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single oy. There is no escaping karma In a previous life, you never called, you never wrote, you never visited. And whose fault was that? Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkes. The Tao does not speak. The Tao does not blame. The Tao does not take sides. The Tao has no expectations. The Tao demands nothing of others. The Tao is not Jewish. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Forget this and attaining Enlightenment will be

This morning at 5:42 Hans wakes me up. He's in the shower, toothbrush in hand and mouth full of toothpaste. "Theum a moose ih thuh crrrk!" "What"? I reply, tongue thick with sleep. "A moose. In the creek". I momentarily weigh the possibility of rolling over and going back to sleep. But then, I haven't seen a moose up close in years. And never in our creek. Besides, it's my day off and I can go back to bed. So I grab my glasses and head for the window, rubbing crusty sleep from my eyes. I still can't focus but now I'm desperate to see the moose. It has wandered behind some bushes and is temporarily out of sight. But I watch as the creek ripples in its wake and then I see it, wading down the middle up to its neck in water. The creek is much deeper than I thought, as I watched only its head navigate the water. It lumbered out near our ridge, tall and leggy as moose are. It's only a yearling, not a full grown cow, but it is i